Tough Questions (1/18/2007)

Hello to All,

Physically, Ann's recovery from Round 6 continued to go remarkably well. She had the pep to cheer at some of Matt's and Hannah's basketball games. She traveled with me to Arkansas to deliver Paul to John Brown University for his first semester. She didn't even require a blood or platelet transfusion this time. Perhaps the extra week of recovery at Christmas refreshed her body a bit.

Emotionally, some days can be really tough. Leaving Paul in Arkansas. Leaving Hannah on her birthday to return to Houston for Round 7. The nagging pain in Ann's back and midsection. Not feeling well day after day. The death of young man for whom we had earnestly prayed. Hope is very elusive some days.

Ann has voiced these questions:

• What if there is no God?
• What if the Bible isn't true?
• Will I be here to take the other kids to college?
• Will I be here for Hannah's birthday next year?
  

The first two are valid questions and appropriate to ponder at this point. They have crossed my mind more than once as well. Yet, I was able to confidently guarantee that God is and the Bible's true. That is the one thing we have to cling to. In fact it's all we have. Otherwise, we have no hope and death doesn't matter anyway.

In some ways the second two questions are tougher. I want more than anything to guarantee affirmative answers to Ann. I'm re-examining the Bible, reading books, and pondering circumstances, yet I'm still unable to promise that she will be healed and live to a certain age. In reality none of us have a guarantee beyond today.

I have found that my toughest task is to encourage Ann to cling to hope, without naively promising things outside my control.

Prayer Requests:

• That the God would enable Ann to cling to hope, even when circumstances seem hopeless.
• That the various tests from last night and today would show that the chemo is continuing to kill the cancer. (We will take whatever God gives, but would love it if the cancer was no longer visible.)
• That God would heal Ann in his time and way so that she might know our grandchildren.
  

John 6:66-68:
After this many of his disciples quit following him and did not accompany him any longer.
So Jesus said to the twelve, "You don't want to go away too, do you?"
Simon Peter answered him, "Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words of eternal life.


Thanks for caring and praying,
Howard & Ann