Saturday, June 30, 2007

Why Keep Asking? (6/30/2007)

Hello to All,

We received relatively good news from the oncologist yesterday morning. The cancer in Ann's bones is still "stable" (unchanged). It hasn't grown since chemo started in September. However, the tumors in her liver did show "progression" (growth) since the last scans seven weeks ago. The doctor was not alarmed because it often takes some time for the chemo to halt the momentum of the cancer. The breaks have been applied, but the car hasn't come to a complete stop yet. She is confident that we should continue with this regimen of chemo because the cancer responded to it. Hopefully our next scans will show that the tumors have stopped growing or perhaps have even begun to shrink.

God didn't answer our specific prayer for "stable." He did give us what we absolutely needed - chemo that effectively attacked the cancer. We would have been devastated at this point had the cancer been unresponsive to this new chemo regimen.

Ann was also encouraged to learn that the "hit by a truck" feeling was a common side effect of the chemo that she receives on Day 8 of each cycle. Knowing this will enable us to manage expectations and schedules, and it should help to keep Ann's mind from wandering into unnecessary places.

As we were leaving the hospital to return to Dallas, Ann remarked that she was at peace with the news and hopeful. I tried to mask my surprise when we got in the car and didn't ask for elaboration. After making a number of calls to update family and friends, I learned the source of her unexpected response. Several had specifically prayed for Ann to have peace and hope after yesterday's appointment. I'm sure many others did as well. Thank you.


I went to a funeral on Monday for the husband of a co-worker who died in a boating accident. He was 43 years old, loved his family, and was active in his church. He left behind his wife and three daughters, of whom the youngest seemed to be about six. His death was a major source of my discouragement over the last few weeks for two reasons.

First, I was again slammed with the reality that we live in a fallen world. No one is exempt from tragedy. Death comes to us all; sometimes without notice. Authors or preachers who claim that God always heals or always answers prayers fail to account for this reality and neglect scriptures on suffering. As I work to rethink my theology of healing, I am forced to review my theology of suffering as well. The two exist in tension.

Second, I was haunted by the question, "What right do I have to ask for Ann's deliverance?" This new widow didn't even have a chance to ask. Others have suffered and died from cancer, why should Ann be any different? On the one hand I have no basis. Our reasons for asking for healing are no more worthy than anyone else's. On the other hand I am God's child by grace and my Father graciously encourages me to ask. The scriptures below are a sampling of the reasons that I will continue to ask.

Keep on Asking:

  • Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him... (James 5:14-15)
  • If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. (John 15:7)
  • Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. (Heb 4:16)
  • This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us... (1 John 5:14-15)
  • Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up... (Luke 18:1-8)

Prayer Requests:

  • That the test results at the end of August would show that the cancer has stopped growing, that it is once again "stable."
  • That we would find his strength in our weakness (2 Cor 12:9) so that we can keep running this race.
  • That patience and forgiveness would characterize our relationships (parents to children and children to parents) rather than anger and arguing.
  • That God would heal Ann in his time and way so that our grandchildren can know her love and faith.

Thank you for praying and caring for us.

Love,
Howard & Ann

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